Well, today I concluded my time at Speedwell Heights Brethren in Christ Church as their youth director. It truly was a bittersweet occasion. Although I felt a sense of relief knowing I will take some time off to focus on our family and spend time healing together, I really felt like I was leaving a part of me behind. I started working at Speedwell when I was 23 years old and now I'm 27. I've grown up in so many ways while working there and I believe a part of me will always remember my time at Speedwell as a significant part of my life. While working for the church Chad and I moved to a new home, got pregnant with Camden, had Camden and lost Camden. Like I said this morning to the congregation, I have been amazed at the love and support we received during the past few years. I have felt incredibly blessed to work for a place that grieved alongside with us and put no pressure on us to move on or get back to work by a certain time. I know many employers wouldn't show this kind of grace to their employees. I can now see why God called us to Speedwell. It was not only to work with their awesome teenagers but also to have a faith base support system to get us through the past year. For that we're eternally grateful.
As we look towards the future I can honestly say we have no idea where God will take us. I have no job to move into. We have no idea if anymore kids are in our future. We don't know where we will go to church. As a planner and control freak, these statements sound a bit scary but I also see the beauty of the unknown. This will be a time in my life where I need to fully trust in God for the next steps in life. Sadly, this isn't something i'm familiar with. I've been known to plan my future and tell God about it later. But not this time. I will let prayer and faith guide me. To be honest I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders knowing I don't have to make these decisions alone. And to me that is a beautiful thing.
Peace is surrounding me right as I wait to see where I will go and what I will do. I'll keep you posted :)
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