Soulmates

"Soulmate" is a term used over and over again in romantic comidies to describe two people who are madly in love with one another. My idea of soulmates has been based off of Nicholas Spark's love novels such as " A walk to remember" and "The Notebook." After thinking long and hard I couldn't really give you a good defination for soulmates, so I did what any twenty-seven year old blogger would do....googled it. Here is a what I found. The Urban Dictionary defines soulmate as "A person with whom you have an immediate connection the moment you meet -- a connection so strong that you are drawn to them in a way you have never experienced before. As this connection develops over time, you experience a love so deep, strong and complex, that you begin to doubt that you have ever truly loved anyone prior. Your soulmate understands and connects with you in every way and on every level, which brings a sense of peace, calmness and happiness when you are around them. And when you are not around them, you are all that much more aware of the harshness of life, and how bonding with another person in this way is the most significant and satisfying thing you will experience in your lifetime. You are also all that much more aware of the beauty in life, because you have been given a great gift and will always be thankful."

Phew! That was long. So I've always assumed the label soulmate was only meant in terms of a romantic love. Yes, I know chad is my soulmate for so many reasons but the more I read into it I believe we can find your soulmate through friendship and even parenting. The love you experience as a parent and the connection you feel with your children is undeniable and at times overwhelming. The connection you share with your child starts from the moment you hear their heart beat till...well eternity. It will never end.

Both of my children are my soulmates but for the past few weeks I've marveled at the connection I share with Cali. Not only is she my child, but I sincerely believe she is my soulmate. And Chad's too. We could have never guessed how special Cali would have been to us the day we found out she was in my belly. I know all children are special to their parents but Cali share's an experience with Chad and I that no one else has. She is the only other person who loved Camden as much as we did and misses him as much as we do. Even though she is young in age, that doesn't mean I believe she feels less or she didn't love Camden as much as we did. It just looks different. At night we lay together and say our prayers. We hold hands and we all take turns talking to Camden. She likes to talk to him. She likes to sing to him. Sometimes I cry, no many times I cry and she comforts me saying "Mommy it's ok, don't cry. I miss Camden too." She amazes me with this wisdom and kind spirit. I know she is only 3 but She, Chad and I share love for one another that I couldn't find anywhere else.

It's hard for me to be away from her because I fear she will be taken away from me too. I don't think my heart could handle losing her. I kiss her every chance I get and I tell her I love her ALL the time. First thing in the morning I hold her in my arms until I ABSOLUTELY need to get up. I thank God that she woke up and remember what a blessing that is.

My bond with my Cali Love is simply indescribable. It can only be felt. I thank God everyday for her.